Thursday, March 29, 2007

Sutta

“Hey guys, enough of studies. Let’s go for a smoke…”This was Anurag…A young boy who was appearing for +2 examination…

“Yes,I am feeling sleepy and a smoke will definitely help”…Rajat said

“Why don’t you people lower down the volume while you talk these things? If mom heard anything by mistake then I am dead…hope you can understand my concern.” This was Mrinal… Anurag and Rajat had visited to Mrinal’s place for combined studies… Combined study means less studies and more fun. So, a total time pass…

The boys bought a few cigarettes and then they started thinking of a safe place where they can enjoy the smoke. They decided to go to a park. In some time they reached the destination and lighted the cigarette. Anurag and Rajat were smoking. Mrinal was not a smoker by now. So, he was trying to scare a stray dog with a pebble. They found a bench and lit the cigarette. Rajat asked Mrinal for a smoke. Mrinal refused. Rajat and Anurag started making fun of him. A man was watching all these things. The man started towards the boys.

“Guys, why are you forcing him to smoke? Why are you making fun of him if he does not want to smoke?” The man asked…

Mrinal replied,” Its ok. They are my friends and I was not forced to do anything. ”

The man said,” I will tell you a story”.

A Bengali family used to live in my neighborhood. Mr. Chakraborty was the head of the family. He had two daughters (Sanchita and Dolly) and a son (Sanjay). He was a contractor and the business was doing well. So, everything was going on fine. But, he used to smoke a lot and that too cigarettes without the filter. He got infected by cancer and died. Now, the family was in great trouble. Aunty could not get a job ‘coz she was too old to get the job. So, started a boutique and Sanchita, she was the eldest and was pursuing BA, started tuition along with her studies. Sanjay was too insensitive to understand the situation. He was still busy with the sports. Dolly, the youngest girl was too young to do anything. So, she took admission in a government girl’s college. The death of the uncle was a disaster for the family.

So, you are not living for yourself. Even if you think that it is your life and you can live it the way you want, your fate is going to affect your dear ones also. Did you ever think what will happen to your mother, father, sister if something happens to you? May be you are too young to understand these things but if you do not control yourself now then nobody knows the future. You might be another Chakraborty Uncle. So, think over it.

So saying, the man left.

The lecture was not for Mrinal as he was not a smoker. Rajat had a change of heart and decided to quit smoking. But, the whole lecture didn’t have any effect on Anurag who said, “I don’t give a damn…Saala free ka lecture pila gaya….”

Monday, March 26, 2007

Namaste London…..

“I am born and brought up in London…Completed my education here…I have British friends…I have British accent…then how I can be an Indian….I am a British…then how can I marry an Indian boy…”…A dialogue by Katrina Kaif (Jazz aka Jasmeet) in “Namaste London…”

My Opinion on this….We were Indians…we are Indians…we will be Indians…Wherever we go…whatever we do…we must not loose our identity of being an Indian…One may serving US army or a British army…or working as a scientist at NASA….or doing something which can be done by a citizen of that country only…but, he/she is still an Indian…I am not saying that they should be biased towards India….they should do it with all the honesty…’coz if something goes wrong then they will be called an Indian…not the citizen of that country…so, if the defame goes to India then it is worth the fame also… I do not understand why some people feel that they belong to better species if they are not Indians…they are shy to be called as Indian…Why…?…and in the end…I have not seen any American (or British or …) calling himself /herself an Indian…To bhaktajanon…zor se bolo….”We are proud to be Indians…”

In the whole movie, the actor…the protagonist…Akshay Kumar…didn’t utter a single line in English…though he knew how to speak...read and write the English language…I am not saying that you should talk to other person in your mother tongue who doesn’t understand single word of it….but, if all of us know Hindi (or Marathi or Kannada or Gujarati or Punjabi or Telugu..) then I don’t feel the need to talk in English…Yesterday, I went to a restaurant for dinner…a group was sitting next to our table…and was making fun of the Hindi words….what was so funny in that…I could not understand…they are sick…We are ready to accept a foreign language but averse to an Indian language….Why…? I have been to Europe…people do respect their mother tongue and those countries come into the category of developed nations…the development of those countries was not hampered just because they do not use English….I can understand that English is global language and we are making an impact in the global scenario because we are good at English…but we should not make it a quintessence of our social life…

Another dialogue in the movie by a British….”My grandfather used to tell me that if we (British) leave India on its own then mafias will rule there… ,and I swear, same is happening in India…”…(not the exact dialogue…)...I feel that this is a truth at this moment but we can bring a change...

Overall…it’s a nice movie and ‘Jazz’ is worth watching…..

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Youn hota to kya hota….

Agar main munna bhai hota…..

If I were munna bhai

  • I would have had Gracy Singh as my girl friend….
  • I would have circuit as my assistant….and who could make anything possible….anything bole to anything….arey Circuit kuch bhi kar sakta hai..
  • I could have asked Rustum to leave the medical practice and become a software engineer….and then do all the work for me…
  • I would have ragged my senior….
  • I would have fought for a noble cause
  • I would have not been living like a self centered, selfish boy…

Enough of Munna Bhai….it’s time to become Krrish…
To, agar main Krrish hota….

If I were Krrish…

  • I would have not loved Priyanka Chopra…’coz I love Gracy Singh and cannot compromise on that…..
  • I would have opened a “Krrish Station” where anybody can send message in case of any emergency…
  • I would have fought for India against anyone who dares to cause problem for India
  • I would have joined the Indian Army….

”Desh Bhakti” it is and I love my country…

“Janani Janmabhumisha Swargadipi Gariyasi…..”

(Janani(Mother) aur Janmabhumi(Matrubhumi) Swarga se bhi Badh kar hoti hain…yes they are..)

…Agar main Anand hota…

If I were Anand

  • I would have faced the truth like he did…
  • I would have proposed the girl I love…wouldn’t have kept the rose in my diary…
  • Would have made infinite friends like he did by tapping someone from behind and calling him “Murarilaal”…

To be continued……………

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Time pass……..

Work was hard to find…
So, I thought of working on something mine….
(Two lines of my first poem….)

Sometimes when you are alone at home…You start something…but you cannot concentrate…Yesterday, I was alone in my house wandering here and there…searching for something I can pass time with…have a few books…but didn’t want to read anything…took out my badminton racquet... practiced a few shots which I generally do not play while in court…thought of working on my footwork…practiced for a few minutes…then…skipping…was tired after a few minutes…

So, I switched on the TV...started with the news channel…

Aaj Tak:
Aj ka prashna: Kya Bharat ke khiladi apne form main waapis aa gayein hai…?

Star News:
Kal ka poll tha: Bharat ki haar ka zimmedar kaun? A) Sehvaag B) Sachin C) Dhoni

45 % logon ne Sehvaag ko haar ka jimedaar bataya...

What the heck...? I just cannot understand why the news channels start these stupid polls…and some intellectual people respond to them…

Moved to music channel…the music channels always play the same songs…actually, if you like a particular song and you found it being played at a particular time…then u can watch it again at the same time from then onwards…

So, switched to movie channels…well, some channels play the same movies throughout the month…movie of the month means select a movie and show it for a month…Like Start One loves to play…No Entry…Kyonki Main Kabhi Jhooth Nahi Bolta…I think…these movies are the “movies of the year”….

I switched off the TV in frustration…

When I was a child...when we did not have many options on TV...we used to love everything being shown on the TV....but now...the choices spoiled everything.........

“Ab kya karein…?”

I love music…just cannot live without it…So, inserted a MP3 in the player…and Kishore Kumar’s mellifluous voice was in the air…I love it…love it and love it…fell asleep while listening to the songs…..and woke up when my roommate rang the call bell…

Life would have been better if we knew what makes us happy...........................................

Friday, March 16, 2007

Attitude Matters…….

Once upon a time…there was a boy…who used to dream a lot…who believed in the quote “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams…”…By Eleanor Roosevelt….who knew that a day will come when he will be crowned…

And now the boy has grown up…He has lived to his own expectations to some extent….He wanted to be an engineer…he wanted to be at the best college…He has the degree and that too from a good college if not the best…he wanted to be in the top ten of the students of his engineering batch….he was in the top ten of the students if the counting starts from the largest number to the lowest number…He wanted to be an entrepreneur and he is progressing….Somebody asked him once…

Where do you see yourself after an hour…the answer was…an employee of your company…He was sitting in an interview which had just started and would last for an hour….

Then the interviewer asked…Where do you see yourself after five years from now? ...I will be the CEO of BLITZKRIEG Technologies… (The name of my Company)…How is it..?

Why do you think that you shall open a company…? ...Answer was…Everyday when I fell asleep I see myself as a CEO of my company…

It is a dream…it may or may not be true...Utkasrha said…God has installed a special feature in me…My dreams come true

What have you done to achieve your goal…? Ans: Whatever I do…I do it for my dreams…and every step I take is towards my goal…

Why do you think that joining us will help you….? Ans: I want to join you because you are the best in what you do…and your company can give me the technical expertise I need to construct the building I see in my dreams…

Utkarsha will be successful…he knows it and he has the attitude…

A fact:

If

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Are mapped to

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Then,

Hard Work

H+A+R+D+W+O+R+K

8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

Knowledge

K+N+O+W+L+E+D+G+E

11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

Love

L+O+V+E

12+15+22+5 = 54%

Luck

L+U+C+K

12+21+3+11 = 47%

Most of us think this is the most important??? )

Then what makes 100%?

Is it Money? ... NO!! !

M+O+N+E+Y

13+15+14+5+25 = 72%

Leadership? ...NO ! ! !

L+E+A+D+E+R+S+H+I+P

12+5+1+4+5+18+19+9+16 = 89%

Every problem has a solution if we change our attitude. To go to the top, to that 100%, what we really need, to go further, ...is the right ATTITUDE.

A+T+T+I+T+U+D+E

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

Cheers,

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Orkut….Pink…and Axe

I was in hurry, so decided to take the stairs instead of the lift. I had to move out of the Bangalore central as quickly as possible because somebody very special was coming to meet me outside the mall. I had to give some things to the person….

I received the message that he will take more than half and hour to reach B'lore Central....So, slowed down a bit...

Suddenly, I felt that something was making me crazy…could not control my senses…closed my eyes started feeling what it was…it was something which cannot be seen or felt by touching it…It was a fragrance so sweet that the sweetness cannot be described in the realm of twenty six letters…It was a weekday so the mall was almost empty … Coming back to the fragrance…I was following the fragrance with eyes closed…do not know how was I managing to walk without clashing with something…anyway, opened my eyes when felt that I am closest to the source of the fragrance...My God…She was as beautiful as (choro jaane do)…

I asked, “Hey, what perfume are you wearing?”

She turned around…well, I saw her profile first…So, I can say how beautiful she was… She was perplexed for a moment and then turned back…Perhaps she couldn’t realize that I was talking to her…

I asked again, “I am talking to you, what perfume you are wearing today?”

She smiled and replied: Pink.

Do you know any such thing which can attract the attention of the girls like your perfume did with me?

Yes…Axe…She replied.

Me: Can you do me a favour?

She replied, “What favor…we don’t know each other and you are asking for a favour...”

Me: Myself Utkarsha…and I know that you won’t tell me your name…so I will call you, Pinky…is it ok?

Pinky: Yes…absolutely fine…So, what favour do you want from me?

Me: Actually, I came here to meet someone and it will take more than half an hour for him to reach here. I was getting bored. But your perfume really helped me to come out of the boredom. So, I want to treat you with a cup of coffee…Just a few steps away from here…

Pinky: ok…

Me: Do you know why I asked for coffee…ok….I’ll tell you…Actually, somebody told me that ”Anything can happen over a cup of coffee…”…

Pinky: Yes…Somebody told me also...

Me: Hmm… let’s explore ‘anything’…

Me: So… Pinky…what do you do?

Pinky: hey…don’t call me pinky…my name is Anumeha….and I really like my name…I am studying medicine…

Me: So, you are a doctor…

Anumeha: Not now…but will be a doctor in the next few years…what about you..?

Me: I am a software engineer…

Anumeha: my friends always say that the software job is not happening…

Me: It’s happening…depends upon how one thinks about what he does…

We ordered the coffee…

Me: Are you on Orkut?

Anumeha: No…but, one of my friends told me that it is a fun website…where guys and girls upload their pictures and can keep in touch by writing messages to each other…but the bad thing is that the boys flood the female profile with unnecessary messages…

Me: Look...every boy wants to have a girl friend with the condition that the girl should be beautiful…Now, some guys are very shy and cannot even talk to the girls properly...But, they want to be friend of some one beautiful…How can they achieve this goal…?...They think that the orkut is a platform on which they can make a new friends…It is a human instinct and no one can help it…So, they keep messaging, visiting female profiles…may be one day they will be lucky….If you see the messages posted in the scrapbook, where we write messages and it is visible to all, of females with ‘presentable’ looks…you shall find hilarious messages e.g. “Hw hv u bin?.....”Wanna be frenz..?”…” “Friiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnddddddddddddddzzzzzzzzzzz”” …the boys know that the messages won’t help them…but they write it…because they have hope…I have read quite a few intellectual blogs written by girls with ‘presentable’ faces…the blogs is all about making fun of the boys who do not have command over the English language, who could not understand that it is absolutely useless to write this crap…poor guys…aren’t they?

Anumeha: But, they flood the scrapbooks of girls with the crap…they should understand that this is not going to help…in turn it makes a bad impression…

Me: They do not have the common sense to understand these things….or they are too immature to understand these things…

Anumeha: Hmmm…You are right…

By this time we had finished our coffee…Anumeha wanted to leave….and I had to meet someone special....So, we exchanged email ids and left…..

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Dil Pe Mat Le Yaar…………

It was a one o’ clock in the night and four of us…BC1, BC2, BC3 and BC4 were not ready to sleep…It was too early to go to bed in the good old days…We were standing in the hostel lobby and the “Bakar” was on in full swing…I do not know the reason why everybody slept early on that bright “moony” night….We were planning to go out and have a cup of tea…

Suddenly, we heard somebody unlocking the door…oh…it was it was GB who suddenly felt the need to visit the restroom…perhaps the dream scared him…he was running towards the restroom with a soap case swinging in his hands…We could understand the urgency…so we asked him to relax and run carefully…but GB didn’t have time and patience to relax so he ran away quickly….

BC1’s mind was a “Shaitaani Dimaag”…He asked,”Does somebody have crackers?”…Deepawali had passed a few days back…so it was quite probable that something is left….Fortunately (or unfortunately), BC2 had one “Sutli Bomb”…and then…BC3 went to the rest room …GB was in (not inside it)…and…….We could hear it from our rooms….the explosion was destructive…really…I mean it…

All of us were scared now….so everybody ran to BC2’s room…but the angry victim of our prank knew that it was us…’coz only five people were awake at that time of night….GB came back and started knocking the door…it looked like the hinges will break and then our bones would also be broken…because he was really angry…BC2 gathered some courage and opened that door…and boom…”Fataakk”….the door opened…the amount of force he was exerting could be estimated by the simple harmonic motion of the door about the hinges….

He grabbed BC2’s collar and pushed him back…BC2 could not balance and fell on the desk…now, it was the turn of the other three guys…BC2 tried to placate GB,”abe dil pe mat le yaar”….GB was furious at BC2’s audacity…he replied, “saale, tujhe deta hoon kuch waise fir bataiyon kaha lia..dil pe ya…******(censored)”…Anyway, he left the room with the warning….After he left we burst into laughter…Our mission was successful…

Some people woke up due to the noise and the other morning the news was in the air…the news was….

“kal raat morvi hostel main visphot se ek vidyarthi thora sa ghayal ho gaya…ghayal vidhyarthi ne gusse main aakar atankavadion ko bahut maara…BC2 ko kai chante pade…bC1 ko laat aur…baaki do ko chappelein padi…”

“kripya jab bhi aap raat ke samay main neend se utkar apni shankaon ka nivaran karne jao to bombs ka dhyan rakhe…koi bhi jag raha ho to chetavani pehle hi de dein….Janahit main jaari…..saasamachar samapt hue..”

This is called manipulation….People just enjoy adding things to the actual news...There are many more stories to be told…Now, the time has come to do other more important things in life…arey yaar…it’s time to leave and have some rocking TT games…

Monday, March 05, 2007

Happy Holi……

It was a nice sunny day… had just opened my eyes after 8 hours of sleep…wore my sleepers…started towards the balcony…was trying to find someone in the traffic on the road in front of our house…saw a few boys…drenched in colors…ohh...it was holi…I cried…with all the strength I had….”Holi Hai” …the boys looked up…didn’t speak for a few seconds …then the reply came from all of them…”Holi Hai”…we cooked the breakfast…and within an hour we were ready for the celebrations.

Shyamal’s House:
Our first “Shikaar” was Shyamal....we made sure that he was colored properly … and after some time he was also a “Shikaari”…like we were

Yogesh’s house:
Ding Dong…. Ding Dong…. Ding Dong….”Yogesh is not home”…some body passed the information from inside without opening the door…but we forced him to come out…it was his room mate…We went into the house to check if Yogesh wasn’t really there…perhaps he was not there… (we didn’t check the bathroom)…”Ab aaye the to kisi ko to rangana tha hi…”…So, it was Yogesh’s roommate who had to bear the brunt…

Jain’s House:
Jain saab was not ready to play holi…but finally he agreed for a “teeka”…the “teeka” covered him thoroughly…then he said..,”Ab...Hum bhi kisi ko nahi chaorenge…” .

Makkhan’s House:
All of us were drenched in the colors completely….and then the song …”XL ki Kudian”…acted as a catalyst for our enthusiasm reaction…We were motivated enough to color the whole Bangalore…We fell short of color at the makkhan’s place…So, Deba called up his family provision store and asked for colors,”Rang hai”
The “Family”shopkeeper replied,”Haan hai”
Deba: Laal rang hai..
Family Shopkeeper: haan hai..
Deba: Hara rang hai…
Family Shopkeeper: haan hai..
Deba: Gulal hai
Family Shopkeeper: Ye kaun sa rang hai..
Deba: aap kis tarah ke rang ki baat kar rahe the..
Family Shopkeeper: Chicken ke rang ki…
Deba: Holi ka rang nahi hai..
Family Shopkeeper: Nahi..
Deba: to phone rakh de turant….

Now, we started for Koramangla……

Koramangala:
We visited so many places in Koramangla that it is difficult to write down about everything….Chilled ”Thandai” was waiting for us at Teekay’s…it was delicious…we went to Chinmay’s place…The “mahaul” around chinmay’s house was awesome….will not get into the details of it…some of us were thirsty by this time…and they wanted beer…



Beer shop:
Suddenly an auto stopped in front of the shop. Three ladies, all above 65, stepped down the auto…ask the shopkeeper for three chilled beers…and GATA GAT…all of us were standing there agape with wonder….Actually, the event happened in my virtual world…In the real world, the three ladies stepped down and walked away….They were too old to continue drinking….

We had to meet some more people in NGV….Went to NGV…we were very tired by the time we finished in NGV...So, it was the time to leave…

We celebrated Holi with all the vigor and enthusiasm…But, I am still missing the “Gujhiya”…”Bhai logon…jo bhi ghar se aa raha ho…Gujhiya jaroor lete aana”….And in the end a few lines I just want to write…

“ek baras mein ek baar hee jagti holi kee jwaala
ek baar hee lagti baaji jalti deepon kee maala
duniya waalon kintu kisi din aa madiraalay mein dekho
din mein holi raat diwaali roz manaati madhushaala“..

---Harivansha Rai Bacchan